hello and goodbye.

HOW TO DUMP YOUR GIRLFRIEND!

2011-06-05T03:34:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

This is damn funny! No offence though.

Goodbye world.

HOW TO HIDE A B0NER IN PUBLIC! UNCENSORED

2011-04-30T03:37:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

Omg this is damn funny and retarded HAHAHAHA. Viewer discretion is advised :)

Goodbye world.

2011-04-26T00:29:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Last day of work today! Lazy to blog about it so shall just leave that to tomorrow.

Anw feel sad for a friend who unfortunately has to go through something that I have been through. Stay strong! :)

Goodbye world.

2011-04-25T01:13:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

Watching valentine's day on cable leaves such a bitter-sweet feeling.

What a day.

Anw last day of work! I am definitely going to miss everyone of them. Shall leave that to tmr.

Goodbye world!

POKEMON IN REAL LIFE!

2011-04-23T04:15:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

This video is epic HAHAHA. Really brings back memories of the first series of pokemon.

Goodbye world!

Strangers, again

2011-04-23T03:37:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

I can really relate to this man.

Goodbye world.

2011-04-18T01:26:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

What a day! Totally dramatic game. When arsenal scored that penalty, everything felt like it was over. It got worse when the freekick just on the edge of the penalty area smacked against the wall, it was like heaven teasing and false hope. Then came the penalty and the goal to make it 1-1. This just proves one thing, nothing is done and dusted until the final whistle.

It was just like those well directed movies with an unexpected twist in the end. One of the best games I have ever watched, though the performance wasn't one of the best. The terrible season is finally showing a silver lining. I am so damn looking forward to next season.

Goodbye world!

2011-04-16T21:35:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Bruised leg, bruised pride. But still, positives to be taken. Hope we really take action in the end XD

我猜 later. Sleep. El Clasico. Wake up for work.

Great plan ^^

Goodbye world.

2011-04-11T23:52:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

What a day today.

After morning exercise, felt damn giddy. At work, suddenly felt feverish.

Please don't fall sick! I still want to like finally play bball tmr, and I still want to earn my moneyyyy!

Goodbye world!

2011-03-31T00:34:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Sometimes its amazing how easily forgotten you are, or maybe its just that you were never remembered in the first place.

Anyway want to share a damn catchy song from the movie 笑着回家!

Goodbye world!

2011-03-27T01:11:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

The god damn fucking internet at home sucks like fuck. Its fucking even worse than shit. To hell with that useless piece of scrap metal.

Goodbye world.

2011-03-24T05:11:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I AM PROUD TO BE A LIVERPOOL SUPPORTER. And I will always be.

Goodbye world.

2011-03-16T00:09:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Countdown to end of work, 24th april.

Countdown to enlistment, 6th may.

Countdown to bmt pop, july 2011.

Countdown to rod, march 2013.

Countdown to uni admission (if I get in), august 2013.

Goodbye world!

2011-03-04T20:14:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Today was results collection. Well disappointed with the C on the cert but overall still satisfied definitely. But still, its hard to be happy when some of your friends aren't.

I really want to help, but I dont know how. I did what I could, now I just hope that they can feel better soon. Yes its a hard blow, but life goes on. Sad, definitely we are, but now its about picking ourselves up. Cliched, but yeah. Easy to say but hard to do, definitely.

Oh well, this is life isn't it.

Goodbye world.

2011-03-04T00:40:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

Good luck to all A lvl people getting their results! Hope everyone will be satisfied with that they get, though this would most probably not be achieved, since its a bell curve and the happiness some get is at the expense of others.

OOPS DID I MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY IF YOU GOT DAMN GOOD RESULTS? HAHAHAHA.

Oh well. This is life.

Goodbye world!

2011-02-26T00:36:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Finally finished watching 海派甜心. Damn cute, funny and nice show! More on the funny side though, if you are looking for less of the funny scenes and more touching ones, 下一站幸福 and 命中注定我爱你 definitely have more!

Quoted from the show '喜欢的人可以很多，但爱的只有一个'

Shall try to avoid another love drama for my next show, 终极一家 seems like a good choice.

Anw, kbox today with zh and sm today was fun! Looking forward to next k/badminton outing, especially with those botak 29th bastards HAHA.

Oh ya, I must watch 'no strings attached' and 'i am number 4' with them or whoever soon too.

That's all from my routine life nowadays.

Goodbye world! :)

2011-02-22T03:59:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

Who will be the next, and hopefully last person to take my world by storm.

Maybe I should stop watching all those taiwan dramas, they are making me far too jealous! But they are far too nice to stop watching HAHA.

It will definitely be worth the wait. Now is still not the time.

Anw 海派甜心 is damn funny! 罗志祥 hair seriously ROFL MAN!

Oh ya, the shop I am working at is having a final clearance sales with discounts of up to 80%, prices range from 12-100+, shoes range from casual slippers to casual sneakers or classy heels. Please do come support as we have a 'bonus' if we manage to sell a total of 600 per week for the next 4 weeks! Please help, we are located at level 1 vivocity, the shop name is called pedder red.

Thank you, and goodbye world :)

品冠-我以為mv

2011-02-17T02:28:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

Yet another damn nice and meaningful song. Another emo one though :/

你总说不想有天让我知道
你对他
有那么好
你说会懂
我的失落
不是靠宽容
就能够解脱
我以为我出现的时候刚好
你和他
就说要分开
我以为你
已对他不再期待
不纵容他再给你伤害
我以为我的温柔
能给你整个宇宙
我以为
我能全力填满你感情的缺口
全心陪在你左右
弥补他一切的错
也许我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生

我以为终究你会慢慢明白
他的心已不在你身上
我的关心
你依然无动于衷
我的以为只是我以为
我以为我的温柔
能给你整个宇宙
我以为
我能全力填满
你感情的缺口
全心陪在你左右
弥补他一切的错
也许我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生
他让你红了眼眶
你却还笑着原谅
原来你早就想好
你要留在谁的身旁
我以为我够坚强
却一天天的失望
少给我一点希望
希望就不是奢望

我以为我的温柔
能给你整个宇宙
我以为
我能全力填满你感情的缺口
全心陪在你左右
弥补他一切的错
也许我太过天真
以为奇迹会发生
他让你红了眼眶
你却还笑着原谅
原来你早就想好
你要留在谁的身旁
我以为我够坚强
却输的那么绝望
少给我一点希望
希望就不是奢望

If you watched 下一站幸福, its totally 花拓也's song!

Ok that is really the last one for today.

Goodbye world!

2011-02-17T02:11:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

Great and meaningful song :)

别打开礼物的缎带
最初充满期待最后都腐败
别打开午夜的电台
别让情歌反覆再愚弄

而爱并没有教给我生存
只教我交易虚荣给天真
可是爱让我们变成陌生人
却变不了更高尚的灵魂

不要吻我只要抱着我
不要爱我做我的亲人
把手借我一天一分钟
做我最亲密的亲人
不是谁的情人谁的某某某

就算我全身湿透透
我也不再被谁牵着鼻子走
如果我还握住拳头
可能我怕我的梦飞走

而爱并不如你想的万能
不能让我们不再战争
可是爱连慈悲也没多慈悲
谁爱越深越容易被牺牲

不要吻我只要抱着我
不要爱我做我的亲人
把手借我一天一分钟
让我还敢做我的梦
做我梦中伟大的微笑的英雄

不要吻我只要抱着我
不要爱我做我的亲人
把手借我一天一分钟
让我还敢做我的梦
做我梦中伟大的微笑的英雄

Goodbye world.

HOT ROBOT SLAVE

2011-02-14T02:21:00.000+08:00

Hello world.

This is a damn funny video ROFL!

Enjoy :)

Goodbye world.

2011-02-12T05:54:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

命中注定我爱你 (Y) BAGUS!

Such plots are rare in real life, but its still heartening to see happy endings. Makes you wonder if it will happen to you too.

Anyway, time to sleep.

Good morning world, since its 6am soon :)

2011-02-09T20:37:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

It feels like old times once again, liverpool are finally back to their best! I don't know why but somehow, I have the feeling that they can still win the epl. LOL like totally impossible but I can just feel it! Shall see ^^

Anyway, busy days at work for the past 2 days. So much to pack, so much to unpack. And now there are items in the shop that are selling at like $12, $18?! From $100+ to $10+, so much discount, very suitable for all the aunties out there :)

Italy and germany, france and brazil, please draw TY.

Etoile and tampines, please score a total of 4 goals, TY.

Goodbye world!

2011-02-03T00:11:00.001+08:00

Hello world!

Happy chinese new year to everyone! To those who don't celebrate, happy holidays!

Time to get ang paos, and get fat :/

LIVERPOOL PLEASE OWN STOKE LATER TY :)

Goodbye world.

2011-02-01T02:04:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I think I have changed a lot from the past, or maybe its just me.

Anyway, chinese new year soon = get ang pao and get fat. Shall not control my eating for now, its the festive season eh, slimming starts again after cny and all the way till ns.

Great song!

Goodbye world.

2011-01-26T23:29:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I also miss fooling around in school, class and anywhere with my class, squad or council.

I also miss cursing certain ppl, laughing at certain ppl, basically talking shit about certain ppl.

I also miss sleeping in class, and the nags that follow when teachers wake me up.

I also miss the anxiety when teachers check your work and you did nothing at all.

Goodbye world.

2011-01-26T23:24:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I miss watching all the great moments of the kop in the past.

I miss playing basketball/soccer after training every wednesday and friday.

I miss shouting my lungs and dancing like a retard on stage or on tables.

I miss waking up at 6am and going to school.

I miss old times.

Goodbye world.

2011-01-26T23:11:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

3 days of exercise will come to an end tmr. Swimming yesterday, badminton today, and gym tomorrow morning before work. I feel healthy again!

Anyway, went to sing k for the first time in my life today with wr mh jason dt louis. Great experience.

Liverpool, west ham PLEASE WIN TODAY!

Goodbye world.

2011-01-25T05:42:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

While most of you are getting ready to wake up for school/work, I am just about to go to bed.

Just finished watching 下一站，幸福. Very nice show indeed!

Goodbye world.

2011-01-18T19:53:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

Spent a day in the north today!

First went to yishun to have lunch with wr and dt. Then went to admiralty to book our BTT test. 7th March 11.45am. After that went back to yishun to watch season of the witch. Very nice movie, though it was a bit surprising that a movie in the cinema has no subtitles! Next went to khatib to cut my hair, even more surprising that there is new year charge when cny is like 3 weeks away? Who cares anyway. Last, went to yck to swim!!

Felt really good especially after not being in the pool for months! Swam 30 laps, very very satisfying ^^

Ugh stupid sore throat is god damn irritating -.-

Goodbye world.

2011-01-14T13:11:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

You try to entertain everybody and talk too much crap that in the end, nobody treats you seriously.

So if you want to be treated seriously, talk less.

Goodbye world.

2011-01-10T21:51:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Finally back home!

Went for ogl chalet on sunday! Played some damn funny and retarded games and then night cycled too! Went to changi village and saw transversites and even had supper there. Wheatgrass bandung ftw ^^

Today, after finishing the chalet, went to cage and played soccer from 2-6! It was totally crazyyyyy! Damn tiring. Result of that, a twisted right ankle once again, and a blue back on my shin for hitting the goal post.

Woo I never had such fun for a very long time already. Hope it won't be long before I experience it again :)

Goodbye world.

2011-01-06T17:38:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

Ok yes fine I get your point. I get what you all are trying to say.

If you don't wish to share, a kind reply saying you don't feel comfortable sharing would suffice. If you need his number, I can give you so that you can ask him all you want personally. All this beats dao-ing. Thanks for nothing.

Goodbye world.

2011-01-06T05:25:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

To add another new year resolution, I hope liverpool are not relegated at the end of the season.

Today once again proves why liverpool have the best fans in the world.

Trailing 3-0 away from home at the 80th min, despite pulling one back to make it 3-1, a missed penalty destroyed any hopes of a comeback, the fans still sing YNWA.

Oh ya, before I forget, I hate to say this but, fernando torres can you fuck off from liverpool please? I can play with more passion than you -.-

I am weird, grumbling so much about something that most probably won't even affect me.

But whatever, LIVERPOOL FOR LIFE. ANFIELD FOR LIFE. THE KOP FOR LIFE.

Goodbye world.

2011-01-05T22:49:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

To my council juniors, JIAYOU!

Don't be discouraged by the negativity. Be encouraged and motivated by the positives! Hang in there and don't give up! :)

Goodbye world.

2010-12-31T02:26:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Damn bored and rewatched this. ROFL MAN.

Salute man.

Goodbye world.

2010-12-30T23:32:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Don't mistake kindness for weakness. Don't go overboard. Don't test my limit.

Thanks.

Goodbye world.

2010-12-30T05:37:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

This is seriously damn frustrating.

Can hodgson seriously just fuck off from liverpool? Along with all those over paid underperforming stars.

Goodbye world.

2010-12-25T23:30:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

You people disgust me.

Goodbye world.

2010-12-20T04:21:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Finally finished 转角遇到爱, though the show is like so long ago. Although it is a little exaggerated, it is making me believe in fate. Not in the sense that everything is fated, but in the sense that we decide our own fate.

Fate can arrange for something to happen, but in the end, only you can decide if it indeed happens.

Sometimes I wonder what will my story be like in future.

Oh, somehow I just randomly remembered this part from 等一等爱情 last week. All of us have at least one goal in life, and that is to find the person that is looking for you. Ok sounds retarded and weird, hopefully it makes sense.

Drifting further, I guess things that happen to your friends do influence you. After the things that happened, I am beginning to worry about myself suffering from the same fate. 知人知面不知心. Who are the people that I can really depend on?

Goodbye world.

2010-12-16T05:57:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Just wasted my time watching a god damn boring game. 90 mins, total of less than 5 shots on target -.-

Ya, liverpool were that poor, as were utrecht.

Goodbye world

2010-12-15T00:40:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

I hate to disappoint. But somehow, I do so almost every time. Is it really just me? Or is it that some things just cannot be helped? Ugh whatever.

I don't want to disappoint people again! I keep saying that but somehow I can never achieve it -.-

Goodbye world.

2010-12-15T00:14:00.000+08:00

Hello world!

Finally played soccer with 4-9 people today! Quite fun but tiring. Rather rusty but showing glimpses on unrusting! My legs were breaking at work today though, with the blue black from yest not helping at all -.-

And finally a break for 2 days on wed and thurs! Anw I just realised christmas is like next week, like so damn fast and unexpected. Nvm I am weird.

Lastly, somehow I feel that I dont belong nowadays. Ya I guess its just signs that I am supposed to shut the fuck up and fuck off. Don't worry, I will be doing that real soon.

Goodbye world.

2010-12-13T21:55:00.002+08:00

Hello world!

Back to singapore and its instantly work again -.- luckily after tmr I got 2 off days finally!

Nothing much to say about bali, just that the place is seriously damn hot with the weather and girls! And also I realised that I had a higher chance of dying from a traffic accident than a terrorist attack there, the traffic there seriously is wtf!! Seasports got me sunburnt, and ppl at work are saying I got tanner! Ok that is good, I want to be tan anyway.

Many things to look forward to this week!

Soccer tmr, finally can use my itchy feet! Jaguar cheerleaders bbq on wed! 28/09 bbq on friday! Ok that is 3, not a lot I guess.

And I must start my slim down programme soon! I will never start it if I continue saying next week! Ok, every week swimming twice, plus the additional soccer/bball. Plus the additional workout at work. Cool I look forward to slimming down and buffing up!

Goodbye world!

2010-12-08T01:27:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Will be flying off to bali later today! Quite excited since I have never been there before! Must take lots of photos of the scenery, something which I have unknowingly taken an interest to!

Anw prom was fun! Post prom was more fun! Though I felt quite weird to be in such a place, it was quite an enjoyable experience! But I most probably wouldn't enter such places every again HAHA! Thanks to sm for his time in planning it! And bro don't think too much about it it was a great success :D

Goodbye world.

2010-12-03T03:44:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

And hello to YOU especially. For your info, I am 18 now. Not 8.

I wonder how old am I in your eyes sometimes.

Talk so much about sleeping early when there is work the next day. Well set a good example for me then by not going for your duty that ends at 2 or 3 (which if YOU haven't realise is entirely for fun) when you are working the next day. And oh your work starts at 8, mine starts at 12. Go figure.

The pot calling the kettle black. How cute. How retarded. How pathetic. Sounds weird but, please let me grow up in your eyes for in case YOU haven't realised, I already have. Thanks.

What a mixed night.

Goodbye world.

2010-12-03T01:19:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

FUCKING HELL CAN I HAVE SOMETHING IN THIS GOD DAMN FUCKING PLACE THAT WORKS LIKE IT SHOULD? THIS IS MAKING ME BLOODY PISSED OFF.

A com that is dying, internet that is non existent. So even after that shit exams I have been through I am still stuck with shit that doesn't work. GOD DAMN IT.

But guess its all my fault in the end. For being too gracious by saying I am contented with everything when everything is just shit. This is so pathetic. I hope all this fucking useless shit self destructs soon, so that they can finally go to where they belong and BETTER stuff are brought in.

UGH DULAN TTFM. Liverpool better win later or else I can imagine myself breaking down the wall -.-

Goodbye world.

2010-12-02T04:52:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

Just finished watching a very nice drama series! 原来爱上贼.

When I first saw the add. on tv, I thought it was just another show. But after watching it, it really is quite special. It touches on a topic that has always been a mystery. Good and bad. Can there never be a force that dwells right on the edges of both. Reminds me of math, probability diagrams -.-

Most events in drama serials seem far fetched, in the sense that we can never imagine it happening to ourselves. Headlines on newspapers, even while we read them, we don't have the feeling that it will happen to us.

Natural disasters, traffic accidents, illnesses, paranormal experiences, etc. Can we really imagine ourselves going through such things?

Anyway, why is night/darkness mostly a symbol of danger and peril? Why can't it be represent peace and reflection. More random questions, is there a time whereby everyone in the world is asleep?

I am getting more and more random, thinking of random stuff, doing random stuff, saying random stuff. Think its the effect of excessive '-random' in dota -.-

Ok, I am incoherent, I don't know what am I saying. Time to sleep.

Goodnight world!

2010-12-01T04:51:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

I don't know if what i did was right or wrong.

But i really couldn't take it anymore. Everything just got triggered out because of that small like mishap.

I feel quite bad to have him bear the wraith of my anger, but he had it coming with all his actions anyway.

Anyway, sometimes I really have no idea why I do certain things.

Already expecting to fail from the start, why did I even continue? Was it to satisfy people again? Well if it is, then it would have come at a price. While I satisfied some on one hand, I get mocked at for my failure on the other.

Well thats life. You can do many things that may make you unhappy, but ultimately, the result of seeing someone else satisfied sort of washes all the unhappiness away.

Sometimes I really want to know what people think of you, so that you will know how to treat them, so that you will know how you can turn to. As learnt from econs, imperfect information exists in the real world. Guess its all part of life. Knowing who you care about, and knowing who cares about you. Well I have answered many of my own doubts, this would most probably remain unanswered for as long as till I die.

Ugh, must be the late night/early morning again. Fuck it. A good night's rest should do the job.

Goodbye world.

2010-11-28T17:12:00.001+08:00

Hello world!

I finally remembered the title of the westlife song after randomly hearing it on some liverpool video.

And I wasn't even close with the 'love' and 'into' -.-

Goodbye world!

2010-11-24T18:18:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

ITS ALMOST OVER! Oh man, why must they set one physics mcq a week later?!

In the mean time, I have no idea what I am going to do until the weekends come and I start revising for that paper!

Keeping this in mind, I guess I would find myself rotting at home after the last paper with nothing to do, except for going to find a work which of course I won't want to so quickly.

What to do! What to do!

Goodbye world.

2010-11-19T23:22:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Oh man after taking most of the papers, I just don't have the feeling that everything will be fine in the end.

I guess this would be time to start making plans for life after getting my results?

So now I am ending up asking myself, 'Will I be able to choose the class that I want to retake my As with?' 'Which class should I go to!' 'Would I become in that class?'

LOL its like far too early for me to think about such shit but I just can't stop myself from thinking about it!

There goes my dream of entering into the psychology faculty. Well, losers don't have the right to decide so I most probably would just have to accept my fate. Be it another shot at the As, or ending up in some faculty that I don't like.

AH FUCK IT!

I feel like saying 'you know what, go to hell but I would bloody get my As and show it to your god damn face!' Sadly, I don't have the confidence to say so. It won't happen, will it? UGH!

Goodbye world!

2010-11-17T23:16:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Sometimes you look at people and wonder, 'why are they like that?'

Sometimes you look at people and think, 'why can't I be like them?'

Sometimes you look at people and say, 'I never want to be like them.'

Sometimes you look at people and just go, 'FUCK MY LIFE!'

Sometimes you look at people and shout, 'WA HENG AH!'

Its interesting how many different kind of reactions you can have when looking at others.

(PS: The list of reactions stated are not exhaustive'

Goodbye world.

2010-11-16T22:21:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Just a damn nice theme song from a quite long ago show!

爱擦身多少拥吻停留过多少眼神
每次当心有痛的指纹
却不知道应不应该转身

拥抱着的人该是什么身份
一把钥匙开一扇门
心里清楚却不愿承认

闭上眼慢慢重温一直在的心疼
还有那放不下的自尊
既然爱是种竞争
就需要有牺牲
认定了就不要再停顿

别总是羡慕别人看似华丽缘分
谁都有不能说的伤痕
爱得浅或爱得深也只是相对的
一种完整
不一定非要区分

The lyrics damn nice!!!

Anyway, how cool is it that you actually set for a paper where the setter just kope something straight from the net! Copy and paste somemore. Ugh.

Goodbye world!

2010-11-14T12:25:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Oh man I feel like my body is degenerating!

A few days ago, I woke up with a sore throat and it soon became a cough.

Today, I woke up with a blocked nose.

Maybe a few days later I will wake up with a fever?!

Ugh, to myself, get well soon! I hate going to exams sick, damn irritating -.-

Goodbye world.

2010-11-11T15:17:00.006+08:00

Hello world.

The long marathon is about to come to an end. This is the final lap, so its do or die. If you fumble now, though very little, you still have time to recover.

Don't let your previous sweat and blood go to waste. Have faith and don't give up.

We do not need to be the best, we just need to be the best that we can be. Hang in there people!

YNWA - 'The Kop'

When you walk, through a storm
Hold your head, up high.
And don't, be afraid, of the dark.
At the end, of the storm, is a golden sky, and the sweet silver song, of a lark.
Walk on, through the wind
Walk on, through the rain.
Though your dreams, be tossed, and blown
Walk on
Walk on
With hope, in your hearts
And you'll never walk alone!
You'll never walk alone!

Anyway, thank you for all your wishes! :) I am very much looking forward to next year because it is such a nice number! 11/11/11. COOL!

Goodbye world!

2010-11-06T02:24:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Tried to sleep like two hours ago but somehow my mind is too much in a whirl to fall asleep.

In the end, I still came back here to let out everything so that I can actually rest in peace.

First, I actually hate myself now. I allowed all this to happen. Back then, I was still wondering if I was actually ready to take on the responsibility. Somehow, I was blinded by myself and in the end, I convinced myself that I was when I clearly wasn't. If not for my selfishness, all this wouldn't have happened. Secondly, back in August when we were on the brink, I yet again convinced myself that everything would be fine in the end. Once again, I was too selfish. I hated the feeling of guilt and agony when I first experienced back at the start of the year, and I guess the fear of causing such pain and experiencing such pain made me convince myself of something that wasn't meant to be. If it had all ended back then, everyone would have been much better off. Thirdly, yet again, just a few days ago, the fear of guilt and causing irreparable pain made me convince myself that there was still a chance when in fact, there wasn't. As a result of my selfishness, I gave people false hope, making them even more disappointed in the end. Finally, after watching some movies over the past few nights, I finally learnt my lesson. I can't be so selfish anymore. I can't let my heart lead my body. For the good of everyone, I must take control of my heart, and not let my heart control me. I decided to face up to the cruel truth and bared the ugly facts. Bad timing? Definitely. Once again, it was my selfishness. I know that dragging it further on and on would just totally kill each other in the end, so to minimize the already magnified damage, I just stopped it once and for all. This time, I hope my selfishness was put to good use. If someone had to be the bad guy, I rather it be me, I deserve the criticism and whatever insults people would start throwing at me soon enough.

Moving on, after thinking through what they all said about opening up, I guess I finally found a reason why I rarely share my problems. For a huge majority of my 18 years, I almost faced all of my problems myself. Alone. Why? Because telling them to my parents was no use, since the only thing they did back then was to blame me, scold me and punish me. Maybe thats why I always seem to blame myself most of the time. But anyway, back to the point, after such a prolonged period of independence, I find it very much weird to actually be telling others my problems. Well, I guess its because I am afraid of telling people stuff when they actually don't really care. Or maybe its perhaps I am afraid of irritating people. But well, I am still human after all. The magnitude of the problems have kept increasing through the years, thus my threshold keep increasing too. But I guess there is a limit to everything. I still need help ultimately. I am after all, just an 18 year old boy. I can be strong against challenges, but I can't be for everything. Sometimes, no matter how hard I try, I can't help but crumble under the pressure. This showed me how weak I was, how vulnerable I am. And I think I actually found out why I hate to be weak and vulnerable. Though I have no apparent memory of it, my parents would from time to time remind me of how I was being bullied back in kindergarten. And of course, my tough primary school times, being hit by teachers and stuff. I guess its because of all this that I have decided to stay strong no matter what, and never to fall no matter how huge the pressure.

But now, things will change. I will change. I shall take the advice and start sharing my troubles. Its quite hard though, especially when most of your friends only see the crappy, nonsensical part of me. But well, there are still people that actually know of, or witnessed, my weak side too. I know my limits, now I just need to know who I can depend on. I still have no idea who are those I can actually talk to without them being irritated at me, but well, guess I will find out soon enough.

Lastly, sometimes I really wish that I could be as heartless or cruel as those people in TV shows, or those people that people usually tell me about. I seriously can't figure out how they can have no sense of guilt or shame. The heart is not made of metal, but made of blood. It hurts so much sometimes I wish I could be a heartless jerk too. Sigh.

However, now is not the time for the weak side of me to prevail. It is the time for me to stay strong and move on. I can't disappoint even more people. Tonight shall be the last night for the weak side to show up through this exam period. If the weak side has to show up again, it will only be after the exam has ended.

Our greatest obstacle in our road to success is ourselves. To succeed, we do not to defeat anybody. We just need to defeat ourselves.

Anyway, have been having really weird dreams recently, especially weird since I rarely have dreams in the first place. Hope its not an omen.

Lastly, crying it out really helps.

Hope I didn't get things wrong this time.

Goodbye world.

2010-11-05T20:02:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

It is funny how watching some movies can actually help you to straighten out your thinking.

Have been watching several movies over the past few days, 'dumb & dumber', 'the proposal', 'what happens in vegas'. Besides making me laugh out loud, I surprisingly learnt some stuff from the movies.

After watching 'what happens in vegas', something dawned upon me.

There is actually no point in trying to be perfect for the person you love because you feel that you are not good enough for him/her. In the end, you can never be yourself in front of him/her and you will never be happy. What you actually need is someone that can make you be yourself.

I guess I have tried too hard to be somebody I am not, and I lost the stamina to do so a long time ago. Oh well, its my fault for raising people's expectations of me and disappointing them in the end.

I don't want this to carry on anymore. I don't want to crumble under the weight of high expectations again. I don't want to be somebody I am not. I don't want to do things just to make people happy.

I want to be myself. I want to be what I am, not what people want me to be.

I am not ready now. I don't want people to have false hope that I would be soon, just because I said I will try my best as deep down inside, I know it is an incredibly uphill task for me to be. Let nature take its course. If I need 5 years, 10 years, 30 years, my whole lifetime to be ready, then so be it. No use rushing it.

I know why you are hesitant. It is the exact same reason why I am. The lack of faith has taken its toll.

But so be it, I have been through those judgeful eyes and mouths before, and I am not afraid to go through it all over again, for the good of everyone.

Thank you and sorry.

林俊杰 - 背对背拥抱

话总说不清楚该怎么明了
一字一句像圈套
旧帐总翻不完谁无理取闹
你的双手甩开刚好的微妙
然后战火再燃烧

我们背对背拥抱滥用沉默在咆哮
爱情来不及变老葬送在烽火的玩笑
我们背对背拥抱真话兜着圈子乱乱绕
只是想让我知道只是想让你知道爱的警告

话总说不清楚该怎么明了
一字一句像圈套
旧帐总翻不完谁无理取闹
你的双手甩开刚好的微妙
然后战火再燃烧

我们背对背拥抱滥用沉默在咆哮
爱情来不及变老葬送在烽火的玩笑
我们背对背拥抱真话兜着圈子乱乱绕
只是想让我知道只是想让你知道爱的警告

我不要一直到形同陌路变成自找
既然可以拥抱就不要轻易放掉

我们背对背拥抱滥用沉默在咆哮
爱情来不及变老葬送在烽火的玩笑
我们背对背拥抱真话兜着圈子乱乱绕
只是想让我知道只是想让你知道这警告
只是想让我知道只是想让你知道爱的警告

Goodbye world.

2010-11-03T22:10:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Sometimes I really feel like how Ris Low felt when one reporter asked her why her name is Ris Low. When asked about how she replied during an interview on the Shan & Ros Show, she answered, '*smile smile*, but in my mind, knnbccb what kind of stupid question is that!'

And yes thats how I feel something. I just cannot stand some people and ya I have been trying to contain my anger since I am very dangerous when I get angry. So on the surface, I am fine but inside I am like 'knnbccb can you stop all this shit!'

Anyway, that means I have successfully learnt how to control my anger! I hope ><

Well, on a brighter note, today bball was fun, though the turnout was -.-

ALMOST sprained my ankle again, the left one this time. Maybe a very slight knock since it hurts a little. But who cares, i got almost the entire month to recover :D

Just a very random joke that I thought of and to share with everyone, I hope its funny ><

Question: 'What is the stupidest thing about superman and why.'
Answer: 'He wears his underwear outside. He is inviting a wedgie all the time.'

2010-11-03T00:50:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Oh man I am damn fickle-minded! HAHA so I guess I shall change back to my previous link until I can think of another one next time XD

Goodbye world!

2010-11-02T14:58:00.003+08:00

Hello world!

Finally changed the blog url, after thinking for very long what kind of crap I can change it to!

Its kind of funny, more people are actually counting down to the end of the A levels than to the start of it, what an interesting phenomenon.

Gah I am damn bored!

Goodbye world!

2010-11-01T19:40:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Changed a blog skin! And added a few pictures so that the blog won't be so wordy and boring, I am sure everyone is already tired of words on notes and exam scripts!

Anyway, with a new blog skin, was hoping to change my link and address but have no idea what to change to! Those that I want all not available already :(

Ideas anybody?

And YAY LIVERPOOL WON YESTERDAY! :DD

Goodbye world!

2010-10-31T23:56:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Just a nice song to share with everyone.

周杰伦 - 说了再见

作词：方文山作曲：周杰伦

天亮了雨下了你走了
清楚了我爱的遗失了
落叶飘在湖面上睡着了
想要放放不掉泪在飘
你看看你看看不到
我假装过去不重要却发现自己办不到

说了再见才发现再也见不到
我不能就这样失去你的微笑
口红待在桌脚而你我找不到
若角色对调你说好不好

说了再见才发现再也见不到
能不能就这样忍着痛泪不掉
说好陪我到老永恒往哪里找
再次拥抱一分一秒都好

天亮了雨下了你走了
清楚了我爱的遗失了
落叶飘在湖面上睡着了
想要放放不掉泪在飘
你看看你看看不到
我假装过去不重要却发现自己办不到

说了再见才发现再也见不到
我不能就这样失去你的微笑
口红待在桌脚而你我找不到
若角色对调你说好不好

你的笑你的好脑海里一直在绕
我的手忘不了你手的温度
心碎了一地捡不回从前的心跳　
伤心过去我无力逃跑

说再见才发现再也见不到
能不能就这样忍着痛泪不掉
说好陪我到老永恒往哪里找
再次拥抱一分一秒都好

Goodbye world.

2010-10-31T17:34:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Well this just shows how much fast things can change, how volatile they all actually are.

One day, everything can be merry and happy and the next day, everything becomes solemn and sad. But thats just life.

Regrets, well there are definitely quite a few but well, since I am 'not ready', as quoted, and thus unable to do certain things, I guess I shall just leave it to the ready guys that of course would know what to do.

And lastly, thank you for some wonderful memories and of course, teaching me indirectly certain skills like anger management, and maybe sort of making me more ready, although I know all that you think you have from me is sadness and just more sadness. But so be it, if thats the case, why succumb yourself to even more sadness when you can experience joy elsewhere? Wish you all the best.

The future is indeed uncertain, but what I am certain of now, is that the judgement has already started. Not that I can do anything about it, people can judge me for all they want, but in the end, as long as 自己对得起自己, then to hell to all of you who judge me.

Society is cruel. The only place where there are no judgements, no grudges, no egos, is of course home, and your true circle of friends.

On a lighter note, I hope liverpool can carry on their momentum and win tonight! Ynwa!

Goodbye world!

2010-10-30T23:08:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Sometimes I really wonder how can I really get someone to listen without being rebutted.

I mean, you never know your own faults until people tell you about them. But somehow, when I tell someone about it, all I get in reply is about how much I don't understand the other party, how much he thinks he has no such faults, and how much some other people thinks he doesn't.

Ya, so what if some people think you don't have such a fault. The fact that there are people who thinks you have means that somehow you give people the feeling you do. However, to be realistic, its your life, not mine. If you refuse to listen and insist there you are right, then there is nothing I or others can do to help you. We have already helped you by telling you, but you refuse to help yourself by doing nothing about it.

Lastly, if you can see how flawed some other people are, why can't you use that skill on yourself for once. Truly reflect upon yourself and think through whatever you have done. Criticism is not just meant for others, it is also meant for ourselves for us to improve.

This really reminds me of what happened two years ago back in cat high. Well it is long over and I guess almost all of us have gotten over it, it reminds me of how funny people sometimes are, thinking that they are right to do it this way or that way just because its their personality. Well, if you have a good personality, then good for you. If you have a bad one, then shut the fuck up and reflect. But anyway, nobody's personality is perfect so I guess everyone has to shut the fuck up and reflect when they have to.

God gave man 2 ears and 1 mouth, I guess that it is his wish that people can talk less and listen more. But maybe not everyone understands that.

Is it really that difficult to swallow a little criticism from people that genuinely wants to help? Is it really that hard to ask if you are going on the right track after blindly thinking that you are just because others have done it and succeeded? Is it really that tough to stop assuming and start asking?

Guess some people are just so delicate to the extent that to them, a little sting or cut would result in them bleeding eternally. Guess some people can't understand that when A hits B, not only does B hurt from the pain of A's hit, A too hurts because of the impact.

Goodbye world.

2010-10-29T21:25:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Blog: An online diary. A personal chronological log of thoughts published on a web page.

Well, I guess from the above definition, a blog would mean a space online for people to share their feelings, a blog would also be a medium for people to relieve stress and to let things out, rather than bottle them inside since sometimes it is quite hard to open up to other people.

Due to certain people being a pain in the neck over what I posted, I shall delete my previous entry, since some people deem it to be a post to victimize myself. On hindsight, why should I let them and their disjointed comments affect me? But since I have already deleted it, then so be it.

Whats funny is that while certain people think they know everything and stop others from doing something, they actually do not know anything, and they are doing the exact same thing. And furthermore, at the end of everything, they are still able to be so steadfast, thinking that whatever they have done is right. How ridiculous and funny!

Anyway, hope everything will be fine for my juniors in the end. Things may seem bleak, but miracles are possible. May god/buddha be with you.

Goodbye world.

2010-10-26T01:44:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Finally liverpool have won a game! It was really heartening to finally see those smiles on their faces after they finally won a game in like 2 months? Anyway, hope they can carry this momentum into their next game and the next game and the next! Come on, ynwa!

Moving on, I feel kind of useless. Well though there isnt much that I can do in the first place, I just feel bad and useless whenever I fail to make someone fail better. Maybe thats why I have an interest in psychology. Hope that I do eventually make it, though I am just wondering how far can psychology take me in the future, since they arent many jobs that is closely related to it. Oh well.

Sigh, anyway to my juniors and friends that havent done well for this promos, cheer up! It isnt the end of the world. There would most probably be retest and stuff for you guys! And if all else fails, I guess repeating one year in j1 to further strengthen your foundation would benefit you when you are in j2! Continue to work hard and have faith in yourself, and never give up!

当我和世界不一样
那就让我不一样
坚持对我来说就是以刚克刚
我如果对自己妥协
如果对自己说谎
即使别人原谅我也不能原谅
最美的愿望
一定最疯狂
我就是我自己的神在我活的地方

我和我最后的倔强
握紧双手绝对不放
下一站是不是天堂
就算失望不能绝望
我和我骄傲的倔强
我在风中大声的唱
这一次为自己疯狂
就这一次我和我的倔强

对爱我的人别紧张
我的固执很善良
我的手越肮脏眼神越是发光
你不在乎我的过往
看到了我的翅膀
你说被火烧过才能出现凤凰
逆风的方向
更适合飞翔
我不怕千万人阻挡只怕自己投降

我和我最后的倔强
握紧双手绝对不放
下一站是不是天堂
就算失望不能绝望
我和我骄傲的倔强
我在风中大声的唱
这一次为自己疯狂
就这一次我和我的倔强

我和我最后的倔强
握紧双手绝对不放
下一站是不是天堂
就算失望不能绝望
我和我骄傲的倔强
我在风中大声的唱
这一次为自己疯狂
就这一次我和我的倔强

就这一次让我大声唱
啦啦啦...
就算失望不能绝望
啦啦啦...
就这一次我和我的倔强

And to myself, jiayou! :)

Goodnight world!

2010-10-15T22:19:00.002+08:00

Hello world!

Today is farewell assembly! It is funny, the 6 years of primary school cannot compare to the 4 years of secondary school, or even the 2 years of junior college. So I guess its not the amount of time spent, but the quality of time spent.

Many of the different places in school have a different meaning to me.

Like back in cat high, stepping into the NP store would bring back memories of my NP life which was definitely enjoyable. Step into the plaza and the years of parades and drills would come gushing back. Step into the classrooms and memories of all the nonsense and scoldings we got would rush back.

Now in AJ, similarly, some places possess many wonderful memories. The hall, where all the craziness of orientation; the reading room, where lots of crap and nonsense are done, instead of homework; the canteen, talking about XXX; basketball court, playing soccer/basketball; the entire track area, where we were being tortured during PE; the area outside LT5, where the cheerleaders practised; the council room, where millions of hours were spent planning and stuff.

A lot has happened throughout the 2 years, and I definitely would not be where I am now without the help and support of people around me. My friends who sacrificed their time to help out, my friends who provided support for me when I was in doubt of myself, my friends who patiently listened to all my rubbish. I sure hope I had made JC life a bit more enjoyable to you all, like how you guys have made JC life much more enjoyable for me. Sorry for spamming all my lame crap on you guys, at least you guys do not have to hear anymore of it! ^^

Actually I have a lot more to say, but somehow my mind is blocked and I keep running into dead ends -.-

Well to end off, I sincerely hope that I can stay in touch with as many friends as possible. As my dad once told me, 'your JC friends will be the ones that will accompany you into your adult life'. Lets hope it is indeed true! Of course, I want to stay in contact with friends whom I known prior to JC too!

Goodbye AJC, thank you for the experience and though not perfect, it is indeed EXCEEDING EXPECTATIONS. To my friends, this is not the end of the book, but the start of a new chapter, stay in touch!

Goodbye world.

2010-10-14T23:12:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Realisd my last blog post was like quite long ago.

Well so many things happened within the past weeks and I am lazy to blog it out ><

Anyway, yesterday I went to school virtually to exercise. Basketball, soccer and basketball. Basically I was playing from like 8am to 6pm? If only I could spend all that time on my studies. And at the end of it, I sprained my right ankle AGAIN, though less serious, and something happened to my left knee such that it hurts every time I bend my leg. Ugh.

And tomorrow is farewell assembly. Well despite all the complains and stuff about AJ, I am sure I will somehow still miss the times where I just stone at the AJ square in the morning waiting for morning assembly, the times where we got tortured together during PE, the times where we played together! Oh man, I must say my JC journey was still very fulfilling, thanks to the many friends and people around me. Thank you!

NO MORE WENDY TOO HURRAY. Thanks for the 'pizza' too, it was so nice I could smell it from the reading room.

20+ days left! I guess I have some sort of an aim now, NUS psychology, 80 rank points, or at the very least NTU psychology. Hope I can really achieve that!

Goodbye world :)

2010-10-04T00:08:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

So many things have happened in the short span of the weekend.

Before that, I was looking forward to these 2 to 3 days of break from the hectic school, but well I got more than what I bargained for.

First on friday night, a heated exchange of words with him. I dont even know whats the problem, me releasing all the pent up stress all of a sudden? Well, I dont really give a damn now since I have learnt that he is far from the perfect image I had before. Things change and I am sure he has, and it is definitely not for the better.

Saturday was a rather forgettable day. Slept at I guess 3 or 4am the previous day and woke up at only 4pm. Actually I would rather just continue sleeping and stay in dreamland. The world in my dream was so much more perfect than reality. Everything that has happened is like a nightmare come true. It has hit me doubly hard because I never thought that he was such a person. Had a talk with my mum regarding all this stuff, but I guess none of the stuff I told her reached him. Or maybe it reached his ear but not his brain, not that I care anyway.

Sunday, went for tuition but was definitely not in the mood to focus or concentrate on anything. Survived the lesson and went to settle my phone line, which was a rather irritating task. First, he refuses to tell me the exact location, though in the end I still found it. Secondly, I am not sure if he knows about it, but I would need the IC of the line holder to do anything, and he needs me to go and find him for it. I shall not accuse him of anything since I do not have sufficient evidence, but seriously him making a fool out of me is not that far-fetched. Thirdly, I just realised that apart from the $30 dollars he gave before the argument, he has not given the rest of the allowance. Lets just see how long he 'forgets' to give it. If he is trying to show me how indispensable he is to my life, then I am going to make his plan backfire and show him how replaceable he is. At night, disappointing liverpool never fails to show why it sucks to be a liverpool faithful. It is hard to retain faith, but I am going to believe. What more can we do as supporters? Since we have decided to be kopites, we are liverpool through and through and we will be liverpool no matter how good or bad they are. Go for it!

I have so many thoughts running through my mind now. Why must this happen now? At such a time. When will this end? Home used to be the place I want to go to the most, but now it seems like a hideout when I have nowhere else to go. Why have things become like this. I really don't get it.

But at least I have one thing in mind, I am going to endure all this shit and hang in there. I have come to a point in my life where the only option is to go forward. No backtracking. No alternative routes. No pausing. Just move forward. No matter how hard, what doesn't kill me makes me stronger. I can do it! Just bear with it, there is no point in pitying yourself because nobody else will pity you. The one and only thing to do now is to show all who have doubted me that they are wrong. I am so going to prove you wrong.

And to him, stop this whenever you want. I have already lost faith in you, just like how you have lost faith in me. I hate it when people lose faith in me, furthermore its you. So well since you have decided to give me up, I may give you up but I am not giving my life up. I will prove to you that it was your mistake to give up on me. 18 years, and you can't even have that extra faith.

As I have learnt, life is so full of surprises and shocks. At one point, something can happen that make you feel like you are the luckiest person alive. At another, something else might happen that make you wish you were never born into this world.

Whatever it is, I can endure. I can survive. I can triumph. I am not that easily beaten.

It feels good to have someone put a smile on your face, but it feels even better when you have put a smile on someone else's face. That shall be my goal in life from now on. To put a smile on as many people's face as I can, and to make a positive difference to as many people's live as possible.

I feel revived. This unexpected disaster is actually a silver lining. I have now been much clearer with what I want in life. So, thanks.

Good luck to juniors and friends with promos. Give it your all! :)

Goodbye world.

2010-10-02T17:15:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I feel like dying. I can now fully understand why people want to commit suicide. I used to think that such people are just plain stupid and cowards, trying to escape from everything.

But, such feelings will never be understood by the average person until he truely experiences feelings that push him beyond his breaking point. I am NOT proud to say that I have experienced that. Such feelings cannot be described using words. It just something you feel. When problems occur and they escalate to a scale scarier than anyone has imagined before, you start to think of routes to escape from such torment. Not surprisingly, the most common route of escape is dying, which leads to suicides.

Living with people that never truly understands you, people that are preoccupied with defending their own actions and not letting you express everything on your mind, people that are over-concerned to the extent that they dont realise they are putting more pressure than relieving it. Such is my fate.

Home, is supposedly the best place to be. Family, are supposedly the best people to be around with, since being family means that you do no need to hide anything in front of them. But somehow, to me, home is not the best place to be in, and family are not the best people to be around with. Somehow, my family cannot accept that I am showing my emotions in front of them. So well, if I cant even express my emotions fully in front of my own family, who else can I do so to. On the contrary, we, as their children, will have to bear the wraith of their anger and stress whenever they are feeling stretched. Though small and less mature, we, as their children are still able to understand their plight, but as the older and supposedly more mature and understanding parents, why cant they understand ours?

It feels so ironic. I used to be think about how fortunate I am to be in this family, but slowly, I am starting to see so many cracks in this seemingly perfect home. I guess its just because though they are very willing to provide, they just cant communicate with us. Or maybe its just me. Seeing how my brother interacts with them, and how most people my age interact with their parents, I am really envious. Maybe its just the way I am brought up, maybe its just me. I really want to be able to open up to them, like how I open up to my friends, but somehow, I cant.

Sigh, of all times, such things have to happen now.

Ugh.

Goodbye world.

2010-09-23T13:30:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

What a day it has been.

First, I thought I was able to watch liverpool's carling up game online so I stayed online until about 3am when I realised that the link wasnt working!! Freaking waste of my time. Went to sleep in the end though.

But when I was waiting, chatted with yan chang about how we are not gay! HAHA. Well, just when I said I was fine with it, then things start to get out of hand! ZZZ! Anyway thanks for staying up an extra hour or so to tell me the liverpool score ^^, sorry for them wasting your time! Stupid liverpool should have won the game easy, now they are out. Crapz.

Pick yourself up for the weekend epl game! Make us dream, and fulfill our dream.

Someone just lend me a time portal for me to teleport into outer space so I can get a break from all this shit! What the hell is wrong with everyone?!

AND.

The legend of chen zhen is quite nice! However, the ending was a bit rushed and -.- though. Well, still enjoyed it though I was freezing inside.

Hope tomorrow will be a better day. SCREW PRELIMS GOODBYE ASSES HAHAHAHA.

And lastly.

Goodbye world.

2010-09-20T16:32:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Have been trying to preserve my sanity but realised I just cannot keep it in anymore.

What the fuck is wrong with you people? Stop trying to put up an act and do this and that with the ultimate aim of looking at what I am doing. If you think you pulled it off well, think again. It was so freaking obvious.

Thanks for your doubt in me, appreciate it very very much.

And well, I know I have a 1 hour exam tomorrow. So I am supposed to sit at my table and study from the time I get home (12 noon) to the time I sleep(12 midnight)? 12 hours.

Seriously what am I supposed to hope for? I want parents to be at home so that at least it wont be home alone every single day like in the past. On the other hand, I wish that they can just stop all this bullshit pretense. Do you even know how irritating it is?

And guess what, I can already predict what you are going to tell me in the next few weeks. The same old crap that I am sick of listening to every single time when my exams suck. How I wish that you guys can stop being so narrow-minded and so suffocating. Well thanks to you I have one more thing to look forward to after my A levels, which is I do not have to listen to all your naggings anymore, something which I have been putting up ever since primary school.

You people do not know it, but my only source of pressure are you two, and the pressure is not helping in a positive way. You will never know anyway. Everytime things seem to improve, you never fail to disappoint me by bringing everything back to where it was. Seems like we will be stuck at this stalemate for quite a while, maybe forever.

Sigh, you two wont even be seeing this anyway, so I guess I am just entertaining myself and releasing myself by putting everything here. Why I do not tell them? Because ultimately, everything will just point back to me. They are not really good at things, but one thing that they are unrivalled in is their ability to divert and shift blame away from themselves. Well, humans are not perfect. I am human. They are humans.

So the only thing I can do now is to pick up whatever is good from them and ignore everything bad. There is no point in telling them since they never change. Period.

Goodbye world.

2010-09-15T22:10:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

It really is ironic about how schools should be wanting their students to pass their exams with flying colours. When major exams arise, prelims are supposed to prepare us for the major exams by setting a similar standard to let us gage ourselves and maybe also to increase our morale.

However, on the contrary, certain schools prefer the opposite. They prefer to set papers lightyears harder than the normal standard and claim in the end that it is of the normal standard. Wow? If they are of the same standards, then I guess most probably the school can close down next year since everyone will be failing. Maybe, somehow, teachers love to see us fail, I guess that is a fetish?

Sigh, luckily not all departments are like this, hopefully.

Prelims are coming to an end! Though my last paper is like next thursday ><

Goodbye world.

2010-09-12T20:54:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

The one week holidays is now drawing to a close. Indeed, as always, most of us would look back now and mourn how much time we have wasted and I am no different, especially with prelims coming up.

Thankfully there are no ptm after prelims so phew. I shall just try and aim to pass all my subjects! 45%, how difficult is it! Why is that I can never get 45% for all my subjects! Must try to achieve that.

Just like how liverpool must try to break their duck at the St Andrews Stadium and win tonight!

Anyway, sigh why must I fall sick now, at this time. Stupid sore throat makes me want to go toilet like almost every fifteen minutes zz.

Jiayou to all! Hope we can pass :)

Goodbye world.

2010-09-01T22:28:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Wow, I finally realised that it is actually reasonable to say hurtful stuff to people when you are angry at that person. I guess this is just karma for me doing that to others before.

Management of extreme anger. I need to start teaching myself that, and start making myself aware that what I say in just a second of fury can actually cause days of heartache and pain. Never say things in a moment of anger, for you may live to regret for a lifetime.

Love for myself. I need to start loving myself and stop subjecting myself to pain and torture just to make sure that others will not. I need to stop blaming myself for every single thing that goes wrong. I am not a tanker in life. I am not cut out to be to be the lead. I am just a supporter, an assister. But well, everyone has their roles to play in life, I guess I am already a lead in my own life if I play mine well.

Goodbye world.

2010-08-31T20:17:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

HAPPY TEACHERS DAY!

Thank you to all the teachers who have taught me and made a difference to my life! :)

Anyway today FINALLY went back to CHS after like so damn long. Went to the indoor court where we kena gl by some primary school kid sia! Wonder what is happening to the society nowadays man.

We needed to pull the basketball hoop out out since it was like out of place. So we tried standing on the table and pushing before I eventually found some metal pole thing to push. We nearly made it, but in the end it was too hard. THEN, some primary school kid come gl say must do this must do this, or just go get the pole from teacher la in some kp tone like he damn big. Like wow? We were the ones trying to help everyone by pulling the thing out and then some boy who was playing throughout there talks like he is some big shot. Grow up kid, who you think you are. We gl him back though and then all of a sudden he went all quiet and continued playing. It was quite funny though, taking into account that I had to arch my head down around 45 degrees to look at him. Retarded kids nowadays, acting like bigshots and kings and queens, must be parents spoiling their kids. Sigh.

Well anyway today was a fun AJC gathering + leonard + kah hoe. To the guys having prelims, good luck! :)

Goodbye world.

2010-08-23T23:21:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

Due to overwhelming demand, I have to supply it, without which would result in a shortage as quantity demanded > quantity supplied.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR! :)

Goodbye world.

2010-08-21T23:02:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Its 11pm now. And my third post on 21st August 2010.

It has been a long day, a tiring one, emotionally.

So I guess we finally decide allow each other one last chance in this, one last time to make this work.

Sorry for the past, I will do my best to make the future a better one for you and for me. And of course for us.

Goodbye world.

2010-08-21T21:26:00.001+08:00

Hello world.

I am seriously lost now.

What should I do next? Can we really move on? Is everything really going to just pass like this?

I need directions.

Goodbye world.

2010-08-21T01:02:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

As I look back,
Memories start to unfold.
Tears begin to flow,
Weeps of agony and sorrow.
It has been so long,
Since I was so empty and alone.
I still hope of a miracle,
Although chances are slim and almost zero.

Goodbye world.

2010-08-20T23:30:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

What a terrible day today is.

First a silver lining which eventually turned out to be a mirage after all. Well I guess I have done too much wrong towards you, hurt you so deeply that you are afraid of being hurt again. So well, I respect your decision and sorry for being the asshole like I always was. I hope you can find a much better guy in the future, and not some rubbish bin like me. So now in my life, I have disappointed 2 people. 2 people who had trusted me. I guess the hurt I feel is not that of having to lose her, its that of guilt. Guilt that you did wrong things over and over again, and now there is no chance of making it back to her. I am stunned, though I sort of had this scene in my mind a long time ago, maybe we were just too different. Oh well, take care and once again, sorry.

Next, sort of sprained my right ankle when playing basketball just now. Then next, my left thigh was close to cramping. Ouch, gg-fied legs. Maybe this was an omen, just that I did not realise it.

Sigh, guess I am really a rubbish bin. Oh wrong. I am not a rubbish bin, I am rubbish. Trash. Shit.

Goodbye world.

2010-08-18T22:49:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

My brother is seriously getting out of hand.

I know both me and him belong to some generation X thing, but seriously, why must I belong to the same league as him.

Two words to describe him, spoilt brat. One word to describe what he is good at, nothing. Or maybe going around talking irritating nonsensical shit in front of everybody and pretending as though he is the king of the world.

I think my parents have been too lenient with him, making him what he is now. Maybe they are afraid of making him into someone like me, someone that rarely talks to them because they have been over-strict with me when I was young. But seriously, if they have been over-strict with me, they have been over-lenient with him. Well maybe I am just jealous that he has been treated so much better than me, however his attitude seriously sucks to the max.

After eating dinner, when my mum asks him to throw the food packets away, his response is 'har i dont want', with him sitting on the sofa watching tv.

When he needs help with his work, he comes to me and say 'eh got ___ questions, help me'. Sorry I am not your bloody maid, dont come and give me that fucked up face as though it is my job to help you.

And when I tell you to bloody stop whatever shit you are doing, I mean what I say. I dont care if you apologize for those retarded irritating shit you keep doing, you better stop all of it before I scold you like how I scolded campers during elects or ab camp. Well, you have been warned. Twice. So the third time you do it, you are going to get it, seriously.

I really hope that you join a UG when you get to secondary school, so that you will suffer, so that you will learn that your attitude sucks. Or maybe all you need is something to knock some bloody sense into you.

It may seem like I am too harsh talking about a younger brother of mine, but if you experience what I do, maybe you will feel that all that I have said is not even enough. OH WAIT, in front of others, he pretends to be this angelic boy.

I cant imagine what kind of monster he will grow up to be if he continues on like this.

Sigh.

Goodbye world.

2010-08-03T00:21:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I guess this is randomness in the middle of the night.

Well I was arranging the files so that it will be easier for kaiyuan to understand and extract, I clicked on folders like 'Orientation 2010' and 'Cheerleading!'

Under Orientation 2010 was a folder called Orientation Performance and when I opened that, inside was 2 videos of the OGLs practicing the dance, and then there was the song for our performance. Not knowing why, I clicked on the 2 videos and watched them. Yes I know I am extremely random but well whats wrong with recollecting precious memories, though I wasnt at the practice session due to meetings :X

Well anyway, after I watched the 2 practice 2 videos, something told me to go to facebook to watch our actual Orientation Performance. Well, while watching the video, I laughed at our silly mistakes at times, how funny we looked dancing (since not all of us are very gifted at it inclucding me!), at the same time, I could feel one or two tear drops in my eye. The performance was really the pinnacle of the highness, the energy from everyone, the enthusiasm, the effort. It truly was amazing. We may not be the best group of dancers out of the 5 alliances, but what matters is that we feel like we are the best, we think that we are the best, we act showing people why we deserve to be best.

I have totally no idea why I am talking about this in the middle of the night, I guess its just nostalgia overwhelming me. It was just a short 5 days. But it was amazing how deep and how wonderful 5 days of memories could be.

Next was cheerleading, and similar to the orientation performance, I looked at it and smiled at how much the group have matured and improved in just a month. I may not have been very useful in teaching them the routine and dance, except for occasional inputs on things that I 'know better', but the feeling of seeing a group of people develop into an excellent cheerleading team was truely heartwarming. All the late nights, late dinners, nagging from parents were so insignificant as I look back now.

These 2 events spanned at most 2 months, but when going through it everything seemed to pass by in a matter of seconds. How I wish I could travel back in time to those times, not to correct whatever I have not done well enough, but just to experience everything again. The post/title held is easy to let go, but the memories and experiences that come with it are seriously too hard to forget.

Well, memories of yesterday should be our motivation for tomorrow. Guess I must apply whatever I have told my juniors to myself now. I still remember telling my cheerleaders about being 'ai zai', after learning that from tiam meng sir back in chsnpcc. If you want to be zai, you will work hard to be zai. If you work hard to be zai, you CAN be zai!

Though you guys most probably wouldnt see this, I will seriously like to thank you guys once again for being part of my memories and allowing me to be part of yours, thats if you dont forget me haha! Thank you my OGls, thank you my cheerleaders. The time with you guys helped me learn and helped me develop, so much that you can never imagine. Life is hard but stay strong! We can only live life once, lets not waste it away and regret on our deathbed!

29TH BATCH ANYBODY HAS AN IDEA WHO HAVE THE VIDEO OF OUR FANCY DRILL DURING POP?! I WANT TO WATCH IT BADLYYYYY! (since 2 years ago -.-)

Crap I spent an hour on this longggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg post! Shall sleep now!

Get well soon! :)

Goodbye world!

2010-07-30T23:03:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

I guess it has been a difficult week for most people, but well the week is over and the weekends are here!

Let all your troubles, unhappiness, sadness disappear as the weekend disappears!

Anyway, just had a great scare when my laptop suddenly cant turn on. So now that I have managed to on it, I am like copying stuff into my external hard disk in case later really spoil. Hope it wont take too long, though the computer said it would take 10 hours?!

Well, just some random thought. Appreciate your friends and all those around you when they are still by your side, for you never know when they would be gone. The ability to make friends is the one of the greatest gifts bestowed upon us. Friends are a priviledge, not a right. Never take them for granted.

I DONT WANT TO GET INTO COMMANDO! D:

Goodbye world.

2010-07-22T22:15:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

Just got home a while ago from school. What a day.

The feeling was exactly the same as my pop in npcc in sec4. I didnt know stepping down was so much more difficult than stepping up.

Many people say that the first step is always the most difficult, indeed it is tough for me to say goodbye today. Its not just the wonderful memories, its the thought of being unable to contribute anymore. Being the house captain for the past year, despite however much that I did, I just cant stop myself from feeling that there are actually things that I could have done more. Certain people around you dont really help too. Maybe its just being a true friend and telling the truth, but I guess I need not be put down every single time you see me. Ya I know that I suck, but I know it myself so you need not rub it in every time. Maybe you are just trying to joke around with me, and yes i take it as a joke, but sometimes overdoing it is really too much. I think I appear too indifferent to others' comments that people arent really treating me seriously, and putting me down on the day that I am stepping down does not really help. Okay I am diverting away from the main focus of this post, which is INVESTITURE!

Back to the point, I seriously have neutral feelings now. Neutral in chemistry terms. The happiness of seeing my juniors stepping up really gives me a sense of satisfaction, however the sadness of stepping down seems to cancel out any happiness. Its really like pop all over again. However, for npcc, as the head of admin, there wasnt much of a legacy to be passed down. But for council, as house capt, there is this legacy being passed down, as a new batch of house capt prepares to take over from you and lead the house. Over the past year, I dare not dream that I have done a great job, despite assurance from my friends, its just not me to satisfied with myself I guess. However, I do wish that I have not done a bad job. I do wish that I have managed to set a good foundation and base for kaiyuan to work on, he does have the potential to emulate me in being the jaguar house capt, though I think this is just an understatement.

Looking back, there are seriously many moments that I can never forget. Just a year ago, on this same day, I took over as the jaguar house capt. This was an entirely new experience to me, something I have never done before. I knew the expectations people had of me, I knew what I had to do. On this day, one year later, I hope that I have met those expectations, and that I have done all that I could.

Next unforgettable memory would definitely be orientation 2010. Great OGLs, great experience planning and executing, great fun, and great friendships forged! The 5 days will be etched in my mind forever. I shant bother elaborating on it, because words can never describe it.

Next unforgettable memory is cheerleading! Though I must admit that I was largely useless for most of the trainings since I know nothing about dancing and cheerleading, I do hope that my long-winded words have helped in one way or another in the course of cheerleading or better, your life. To all my cheerleaders, you guys are a great bunch of people! The way you guys grew, individually and collectively, over the month was truely amazing. Now that your fellow cheerleader kaiyuan has stepped up, I hope you guys can give him your fullest support in whatever he does.

Next would definitely be the 2 leadership camps where I have been an instructor, namely elects camp and AB camp. I may not perfect, but I do hope that I have managed to influence my campers in a positive way of course. I hope that I have managed to pass down all that I know about leadership to you guys. Basically, to me, leadership has no specific model. Leadership is all about being able to switch according to circumstances. Today, seeing some of you guys going up on stage, it does give me a sense of satisfaction, hope that you guys bear in mind the lessons you guys have learnt and enjoy a successful term of office in your respective ccas.

Lastly, it would definitely have to be today. The passion, the emotions, the tears. It was truely a touching moment. Experience, memories, these are part and parcel of life. Now its time for others to shine, and I am sure they can shine much more brightly than we did. Go 27th, though I guess few of you will see this anyway.

Wow, I am like taking like over an hour for this post!

Well finally, I would like to thank everyone that had made this a truely enriching experience. My house reps, my ogls, my cheerleaders, my juniors, my friends and my council teachers! Without the help and support of you guys, I would definitely not have the confidence to do what I had done. Thanks for being there when I needed you guys, thanks for being sensitive to my feelings when I am down sometimes, thanks for your advice when I am lost, thanks for listening when I am troubled, thanks for your assurance when I felt inadequate (though I still feel inadequate nowadays XD). Also, thanks for being part of my wonderful memories and lastly, thanks for letting me be part of your wonderful memories. I am not someone that is really good with all this thank you, and giving presents thing, I have no idea why but I just feel awkward. Maybe the environment in cat high made me so. Well anyway, I believe that actions speak louder than objects, in this case, so I guess the best way I can repay you people is for me to be there when you need me, for me to be sensitive to your feelings when you are down, for me to give you advice when you are lost, for me to listen to you when you are troubled and for me to reassure you when you feel inadequate.

The roller coaster ride has come to an end, and indeed I want a second round, though its impossible. I have truely learnt a lot over the past year, and I have definitely grown not just as a leader or a follower, but also as a person. Best of luck to the new batch of students leader, carry on the legacy that your seniors have built, begin on the foundation they have set for you. You guys can do it!

This blog post is seriously very long, and I am officially screwed for tomorrow.

Goodbye world! (:

2010-07-18T21:25:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Parents are a very good example of economics. In economics we learn that consumers have unlimited wants that can never be satisfied, well similarly parents are like consumers; they have unlimited wants.

They just love to say how lousy your subjects are, how much more harder you must work, how much more effort you should put in. Well obviously they do not really care about how you fare against other people. The school might as well not put the percentile column in the result slip, since parents choose to ignore that column.

Apart from my chem which is 11% percentile, all my other subjects are at least 58% percentile. I guess parents dont like to give encouragement to their child then, since the only thing they tell me after they look at the result slip is '30 rank points how go university'. Such words of 'encouragement' really proves how much they care about your results, and how much they 'care' about your effort.

Effort does not equate to results, does it? Just like physics, which defines work done as the product of the force exerted and the displacement moved in the direction of the force. You can exert a huge amount of force, but if your object does not move, you have failed as you have not done any work. Sadly, no one bothers about the force exerted, they only care about the work done.

So saddening, so discouraging, so competitive.

The society, or rather the only good point about the singapore education system is that it trains up our resilience. The bad points, well they define a child by how smart he is, they judge people by the marks they get, how nice and cruel.

Back to doing transition elements, shall try to sleep early today since i got scammed to staying up yesterday for the liverpool friendly game which was cancelled in the end because of rain ._.

Goodbye world.

2010-07-14T23:17:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Seriously, what is wrong with you people. I just dont understand what are you guys thinking about.

Maybe its just karma. People are doing things that i did to them in the past. But since they dont like it so much, why the hell are they doing it to other people. Well, since i did it to them before, i shall just accept my fate, however i swear i wont do the same thing ever again, simply because it is an absolutely retarded and childish act. Its time we grew up and stop all this meaningless nonsense. If it makes you feel better, then continue wasting your time on such crap.

Nowadays, it seems that getting bad results is a good thing and ppl feel happy for their bad results. However, when you get relatively better results, what should have been good immediately turns into some kind of torture, as you have to be called a 'mugger' etc. I myself have been guilty of such acts too, but i shall put it all to an end today. Practice what i preach. What i dont like people to do to me, i shall not do to them, simple as that. If this rubbish continues even after i stop, then there are 2 possibilities. One, they just cant grow up. Two, they are sore.

After much random thought, i realised that being a mugger is seriously nothing to be ashamed of. Lets face the fact, everyone studies at some point. Even the most playful would also study at a certain time. So come on and lets just grow up. A levels is coming, so who the hell would not be mugging? If you despise a mugger so much, then show me that you wont be mugging even with the A levels looming ahead. Since you hate muggers, then show me that you will not and will never mug.

Muggers have nothing to be ashamed of, but closet muggers have much to reflect on. Being a closet mugger merely shows how immature and cunning you are. Trying to influence your friends to not study, and at the same time mugging furiously at home. Wow i rather not have such a friend.

This really reflects how competitive the society has become. People say that we students never know how unfriendly and scary the world is because we have not been to work. But i guess they dont understand the fact that the school is already a place where we experience all that they do. Deception, pretence, competition. We never know who are our true friends, do we?

I really miss the times of primary school, where the only thing on everybody's mind is to have fun. Just purely to have fun. No thoughts about outwitting each other, winning each other, where everything was so pure and innocent. Maybe secondary school, jc and perhaps university is just the training ground for us to prepare for the man-eat-man society out there.

Lets just stop all the pretence here and now. No point hiding this and that, seriously. Lets just all work hard together and cut the deception.

I have no idea why i wasted like almost half an hour of my time to blog this random rubbish.

Hope my parents wont kill me upon hearing my results. D E S U U. And the D and E are H1 subjects -.- Oh well, i know i have not put in my 100% for this exam. But this excuse shall stop now. From prelims onwards, there would not be any more excuse about not studying enough. For prelims and A levels, i will put in my best! But for all the small random tests here and there, sorry but it will have to depend on my mood and time :X

Back to my electrochem which is totally crap! Argh. Screw chemistry.

Goodbye world.

2010-07-09T18:14:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

An overwhelming sense of emptiness engulfs me. The currently empty house, the empty mind, the empty heart. I havent felt like this in a long long time. Guess its just part of life.

Some things are indeed easier said than done. Despite numerous times by myself and others to remind me to stay happy, somehow the mind tunes back to sad thoughts the moment i am alone. I am just a weakling, without others, i have no power at all. Without others, i just crumble.

Anyway i think i really can win an oscar award. Those who see me around, i bet they can never imagine that i am currently not what i seem to be. Cheerful? Talking rubbish? Being retarded? It is just an attempt to distract myself from reality. The moment i get home, the mask drops.

I am on the verge of giving up. Standing at the edge of the mountain, i am on the verge of making or breaking. Many perceive me to be someone who is always happy, always full of shit, full of fun. But well, since even superman has a weakness, i am no exception. Deep down is an emotional side, well hidden from the public eye, waiting to be triggered.

Sigh, when will this feeling stop? I know i landed myself in this shit, i caused my own downfall. But i dont know how long can i hold, how long more before i give way, how long more before i break, how long more before i explode.

Life is indeed cruel.

Goodbye world.

2010-07-08T18:49:00.003+08:00

Hello world.

Sigh, everything is back to the old FML days, except that it got worse, or at least thats how I think.

People scolding you for no reason, people ignoring you, well everything just sucks. I vowed never to be a negative person again but I just cant help but stay down. Bruised fist, irritating people that have gone mad for no reason, please continue adding onto the list god.

Maybe small cracks have formed since a long time ago, just that I was too myopic to see them, paying attention only to the seemingly intact glass. Now that it is on the verge of shattering, so what if I realised it, it will still break no matter what. I wonder, if there is even a slightest chance to mend the cracks, for if its impossible, walking on a tightrope of small margin for error would be far too stressful for me, or for anyone in that matter.

Maybe it was the calm before the storm. Everything seemed fine at the start, no one was giving any trouble, everything just seemed smooth-sailing. But all of a sudden, everything had to come crashing down. Maybe it was just a reality check, to get me back down to earth, to let me know where i stand, to let me know how pathetic and how insignificant i am. Who am i? I am just a mere person, living on this planet. Who is willing to be there for me? Who will mourn over my death? The death of pathetic little insignificant human. I cant believe adults like you can be so myopic, so narrow-minded.

Sigh, no matter what, life goes on. I have nobody to blame but myself for it. I doubt my worth of a second chance, seems like it is the end. But well, the end of something is the start of something new. Maybe things were not meant to be in the first place.

Argh i dont know what to do, i am lost. Perhaps I am not in the correct state of mind to think, perhaps i am just afraid of a replay of the past.

Goodnight world.

2010-07-07T21:50:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Today must be some weird day uh, everyone is acting so weirdly all of a sudden. One is nagging this and that for god knows what all of a sudden, one is suddenly acting like some big shot. Seriously wtf has gotten in everyone.

Screw it la not like you all care about how much you are affecting my mood? All you care about is yourself, you and only fucking yourself. When can you start giving a though for others -.-

Sigh guess this is my fate? Or maybe its your true colours finally showing, only time will tell. And I hope I would not need to use much time to tell, for I am seriously starting to get irritated.

Sigh, what is getting into everyone? Haiz.

Goodnight world.

2010-07-04T22:27:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Today has been a thoroughly eventful day.

After watching germany owning argentina 4-0 yesterday night, and spain labouring to a 1-0 win over paraguay earlier in the morning, I woke up and made one of the blurrest mistakes of my life!

I left for tuition thinking that I had tuition today since I have tuition every Sunday. But when I got there I only realised that I didnt have tuition today when they told me! Argh what a mistake. Then my teacher sort of went through a few questions for the maths mid year papers and wth man! He did the questions like so easily la! He make me feel so dumb ><

After that went home and well dont want to carry on. Anyway, the cab uncle was like so god damn blur la! Told him that I will lead him then in the end he ownself drive, totally wth la, testing my patience zzz. I am happy that everything went well :)

Investiture rehearsal tomorrow and have to wake up so early T.T though its a holiday! Saded ttm.

Anyway semi finals for wc!
1) Holland vs Uruguay
2) Spain vs Germany

FINALS WILL BE GERMANY VS HOLLAND! Much as I want spain to win but I think germany have too much quality for them.

Oh well, cherish everything that you have before losing them all.

Goodnight world.

2010-07-02T21:37:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Exams over today! Hurray! Though there is not long to cheer since we are getting back our results soon. Anyway who cares, i pity the teachers more, since they have to read all my rubbish work over the long weekend!

Anyway, went to watch toy story 3 today! Extremely nice movie! Funny scenes, sad scenes, it has it all! Seriously it is damn good, now I feel like watching part 1 and part 2 all over again.

Well, exams over, its back to my last part of my council duties! And investiture rehearsal is on next monday! Have to report to school before 7.30 i presume. Though it is a monday, but is a PUBLIC HOLIDAY! So sad T.T

Oh, I think there is this new movie called 'Haunted Changi' coming out in September. It is about a group of people going into the old changi hospital to film ghosts, think its quite cool. Can go youtube view the trailer too!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6DFxX8EhgQ

HOLLAND VS BRAZIL IN 15 MINUTES. DAMN EXCITING MATCH HAHAHA.

Hope holland wins!

Goodnight world!

2010-06-30T21:15:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

The fact that I have a morning paper tomorrow and I am blogging here means that I have already given up on it ><

Anyway, today maths was similar to econs. One word to describe, fuck. Who the hell combines MI with functions?! Still got a slim hope of passing for maths so shall hang on to it before I get my results soon.

World cup last 8 teams are out!
Q1: Holland vs Brazil
Q2: Uruguay vs Ghana
Q3: Argentina vs Germany
Q4: Paraguay vs Spain

So sad that holland needs to face brazil and argentina needs to face germany at this stage, both are potential world cup finals. But well, this is fate! Shall predict the teams that make it into the semi-final.

Prediction! S1: Holland vs Uruguay
S2: Argentina vs Spain

HOPE SPAIN AND HOLLAND GETS THROUGH INTO FINALS! :D

Tomorrow shall be a torturous 3 hours, much worse that for maths or econs, but well who cares.

Goodnight world!

2010-06-29T20:17:00.010+08:00

Hello world.

Day 2 of my prelims has just passed!

For yesterday, GP was still okay as usual, not much I can mug for compre and essays too. For essay I did the question on 'Schools can never prepare us for life. Discuss." A little ironic though, here I am taking my exam and I am writing about how these exams are useless in preparing me for my life.

Today, physics was well, not too easy. The mcq was still alright I think but the structured questions were well not too good. In the mcq, the setter even changed the sequence from 'A B C D' to 'A C B D' cunning man.

After physics was econs which was equivalent to wtf. Case study was still fine, though I fell asleep for about 5-10 minutes while writing my answers. For essays, only one word can describe it, fuck. The question was like ?#!@ epic screwed. Still hope that I can pass it though :D

Finally an afternoon paper tomorrow. Hope I can finally do something for integration and vectors and not leave 20 marks blank like promos last year.

Oh ya, everyone please support 1GOAL: Education for all! It is basically a program that wishes to use the world cup as a platform to raise awareness about the lack of education for impoverished children, hoping that world leaders can do something to provide them with education. Sounds like some GP essay.

http://www.join1goal.org/home.php

Goodnight world! Spain vs portugal later :)

2010-06-24T20:04:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Mid years is like in one week's time and well, i am not really prepared to do well for it. Maybe getting a pass is the maximum I can get. Sigh. Anyway since I will be someone's idol if I pass 4 subjects, I shall work towards that target! :D

Anyway, went to swim again today. Ever since that weird stalker thing last week, I was like more wary today. Went to swim 30 laps today and did so in 42 minutes! Which I think is quite fast for me since well I havent been to the pool regularly. And well I think now I know why I prefer swimming to running. Swimming is like a very relaxing activity and as you go into the water, there is just this sense of calmness, very shuang! I shall reignite my swimming passion like in the past and go to the pool at least once a week, if possible.

Yet another routine tonight, study, dota, world cup and maybe a movie after the match, just to do something crazy once in a while. Life is short, so why not. Just watched 'cop out' 2 days ago after the 2.3am game and slept at like almost 7am?! Maybe shall do the same again later.

Hope holland, denmark, paraguay and new zealand go to next round!

Goodnight world.

2010-06-20T20:48:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Past few days have been both fun and boring.

Friday went to the usual basketball court near the temple in Yishun. Played and went mad to the max with my squad! 29th batch ftw (: been quite long since we could be so crazy too. After that went to eat KFC and it was then that I saw something that I shouldn't have saw ^^ then went play lan for 1 hour and reached home at like almost 12. Was a great day to hang out with my best mates (:

Saturday came the boring day when the whole day was spent at home studying/playing/watching soccer. So the cycle repeated with waking up at around 1pm and sleeping at about 4.30am after the last game.

Today woke up late and was almost late for tuition ><

At night went to eat dinner and I found out that there is something that me, the rubbish bin can't eat, which is GINSENG -.- its totally yucks to the max man wonder why people like it so much.

Went ntuc after that and I saw something damn epic. A woman walked and tripped over a basket being put on the floor. Ouch :/ but the reaction of her and her boyfriend i presume was damn wth. Instead of blaming herself for not seeing the basket, she scolded and asked why the basket was put there. Like so childish man, come on. Though I am not a christian nor catholic, but well god gave us 2 eyes and 1 mouth for a reason. Its for us to see more and complain less -.- Well she certainly did not know that. Oh what was even funnier was that, hearing what her girlfriend said, her boyfriend went to KICK the basket! Like ?%$@! The whole thing was so like so funny, though I couldn't get to see the reaction of the owner of that basket LOL. But well, as usual, people love to blame everyone but themselves, how true.

Anyway, on a brighter note, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIM JUN WEI MY CLASSMATE AND SQUADMATE FOR 4 YEARS! DONT LEGAL LIAO THEN ANYHOW AH ^^ (sadly for me I still need to wait till november T.T)

And also, HAPPY FATHERS DAY! Thank you for everything and I promise to be a better son (:

Brazil vs Ivory Coast at 2.30am! Must watch game!

Goodnight world! :)

2010-06-18T00:43:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Past few days have been routine for me, staying at home, studying, watching world cup matches, sleeping and waking up with the routine repeating again.

Anyway, finally went back to the pool to swim! Like after how many months. 30 laps today, meaning around 1.5km? Yay and shall be playing basketball on friday with my squadmates too! :)

Okay, back to the point, after finishing my swim, some bloody guy STALKED me! Like wtf?! He came out of the pool after I did and bloody followed me into the toilet! Totally freakish man. And after that, while I was arranging my stuff on one side of the toilet, he bloody hell pretended to be bathing on the freaking same side! It may sound coincidental but it is definitely not, cause I made eye contact with that person like at least 3 or 4 times, and each time he was eyeing me with that stare, freaking scary man! I dont even know what he wants from me luh -.- anyway after I realised things are abit too fishy, I immediately packed my stuff, went to the other side with more people and went straight into the cubicle and locked the door! AND GUESS WHAT WHEN HE REALISED I WAS LEAVING THAT SIDE, I SAW HIM EXIT THE CUBICLE AND TRY TO FOLLOW ME AGAIN!!!! ARGH!

And after all those recent stories about people randomly killing others, wow that was a real scare. Nothing like that happened to me before. And my dad also told me before that if someone keeps looking at you, something is wrong. While I guess he was up to something but I have no freaking idea what. He cant possible want to kill me cos he didnt have a knife or what so ever, unless he carries a knife to swim in the pool and hides in his swimming trunks? Yucks.

While, on the other hand, nigeria keeper enyeama really good man! I can forsee arsene wenger trying to sign him for next season. And the world cup really lives up to the billing of being the stage for unknown players, with all respect to them, to showcase their talent for everyone to see. Arshavin did it during euro 2008 with russia, wonder who would now.

Shall get back to studying/dota/facebook before the 2.30am game!

Goodnight world.

2010-06-09T22:03:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

It is amazingly simple to tell who are the ones that care, and who are the ones that treat you like trash.

Guess just nice suiting my name, a rubbish bin is made of trash. Full of trash. Guess that is my destiny. What I have learnt from mortal kombat, every man is responsible for your own destiny. Well I just have to fulfill mine as a piece of rubbish. Oh well.

Goodnight world.

2010-06-09T21:51:00.001+08:00

FUCK MY LIFE.

2010-06-08T22:14:00.002+08:00

Hello world.

Today was a rather fun day! Like finally.

Went to school for investiture rehearsal at about 1.30. Had quite some fun there being retarded and joking around. Lasted till about like 5.

Then had a mini belated birthday celebration for benson. Very retarded and funny ><

Last had dinner with the jaguar cheerleaders at cafe cartel! Total bill for today was $284.85! But while did lots of crazy and funny stuff, sadly nobody ate the mixture we had in the end :(

Anyway, soccer tmr! Must win! I dont want pay for the field rental XD

Shall watch my mortal kombat 2 later :)

Goodnight world.